Archive for February, 2009

Thank you

This past week has been a very full week. A bit of an emotional roller-coaster. There were definitely some points in this week that were a bit difficult. Things got better, however, as they usually do when you take a moment to breathe in, relax, breathe out. Many good things began happening, with perhaps the most exciting happening at the very end of the work week. I received some feedback on the work I’ve been doing. *grin* Positive feedback, in case you were wondering. I feel extremely happy and proud. I would even say “validated”.

validationIn my mind, I see a straight progression from the day I first heard about “SL” to the end of this week. The mind is wonderful that way. ๐Ÿ™‚ It can make sense out of anything if it so chooses. I was talking with a friend last night, discussing everything. She made the point that I did the work. Yes, that is true. But in my mind and heart – I could do the work and push forward and stay determined because of my friends. Actually – these people were not my “friend” at the point where they reached out and offered a hand. (They are all my good friends today.) I see many people who could have simply shrugged and said “not MY problem” and ignored me. But they didn’t. Each one of these people made what probably seemed like a simply, easy gesture. But to me, the recipient – the combination of each of those little actions was life-changing.

It is so easy to be kind, to be helpful, to be generous. You can’t always see the consequences of your actions immediately. But it could be a life you are saving.

Perhaps you know this nursery rhyme:
For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
For want of a horse the rider was lost.
For want of a rider the battle was lost.
For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.

I like the meter, I like the simplicity of the message of that nursery rhyme, but I don’t like that it’s a negative approach. I prefer to phrase things postively.

In response to an email a friendship was born –
Encouragement offered instead of just scorn.
In response to introductions more people were known
Volunteering accepted, a challenge was sown.
In response to distress call an offer was made
A task was completed and yes, “face” WAS saved.
In response to that project a new path was taken
A new life was picked, confidence still unshaken.
And all from the help of my friends.

Some People Never Learn

oncoming-bus2That would be me, of course. I volunteered. Again. For something that I did not know how to do. Again. I threw myself under the bus. I am getting quite familiar with the underside of that darn bus. Is there NO one who can save me from myself?????

So what exactly did I do this time? Well, I volunteered to manage a shopping mall in opensim. Now read that carefully folks. I said MANAGE. I did NOT say build. Sigh. But somehow, that became build. That became: you now own an entire sim, you are responsible for that sim, you need to build the mall, set up the stores, manage inventory for people who don’t want to run their own stores. This is worse than the trees.

I confess. I am writing this particular post on a night when I am tired and discouraged and have other things on my mind. So keep that in mind. Had I been writing this a few days ago, I would have been weeping. I really fell apart the other day and this was part of it. How the heck was I going to build a mall in a week, when I don’t know how to build at all?

Yet again, my post is about my wonderful friends. I know the best people. Honour and Shenlei both volunteered to teach me to build. I even owe Honour a build assignment. Yeah, yeah, I’ll DO it Honour, I promise. Didn’t I FINALLY make it to the new store? But I’m a bit overwhelmed this week. There is soooooo much going on in RL. I am sooooo far behind on everything. So despite their kind offers, I knew I couldn’t build a mall.

a-little-tiny-mallJo to the rescue. Jo offered to build me a mall. I seized that offer as a drowning person grasps the rope. Not only can I not build, my mind is totally devoid of ideas this week. So when Jo offered a plan, and ideas, and an offer to build, I jumped.

Excuse me while I insert another “Lesson I Have Learned in My Life”. It’s no shame, no sin, to ask for help. I used to think that it was a sign of weakness or failure to ask for help, to not do everything myself. On a professional level, I was usually able to admit to gaps in knowledge or speak up and ask for assistance. In that milieu hiding ignorance and lack of skill seemed to be the greater error. But in my personal life – I felt obliged to be SuperWoman. Everything was MY responsibility. No one could do things as well as I. I have discovered, however, that my life is much better, my relationships much more enjoyable, healthier, when I say to people “I need help on this matter”. I have learned that accepting help from others makes all of us feel better. Them, because they feel good that they were able to help and brighten someone else’s day. Me, because I had time to breathe. Okay. We now return to our regular programming…..

I’ve not been there yet (to my sim in Opensim where supposedly my mall now exists) but I believe that there is a very small mall there – 8 stores. There are also 5 carts. I believe that I can change the textures and modify and landscape and bring in plants. As soon as I figure out how and find legally allowable objects.

Wish me luck. Yet again I have gambled my professional reputation. ๐Ÿ™‚ Yet again I have thrown myself under the oncoming bus. Yet again my wonderful friends are coming to my rescue.

I love my life. I love my job. I am truly one of the most fortunate people I know. Yes, yes, Nana, avert the evil eye. ๐Ÿ™‚ But I am learning so much. And I am so happy even though I am somewhat overwhelmed and over-committed.

More Newbies

their-first-sl-joyI was hanging about, doing some odds and ends when Shenlei IM’d me. She had some newbies who wanted to learn to ride. ๐Ÿ™‚ Oh wow, twist my arm. An excuse to take time to go riding in SL? I am so there. So I tp’d into the gateway at Shengri La and met the newbies, Gaia and Annia. The 4 of us tp’d over to the stables. Shen and I were explaining SL nuances, assuring them both that all would be fine.

I realized as I listened to them how far I have come. I remember a friend saying to me that he wished he could go exploring with me because I got so excited and had so much fun. welcoming-gaia-and-annia-to-slThat he had lost some of that joy and excitement. I hate to say this but I think that perhaps I, too, am getting somewhat jaded. I listened to Annia and Gaia exclaiming and reacting, and I realize that I now take a lot of this in stride. I EXPECT there to be horses and carriages and animals and such. They were incredibly excited and pleased to hear the horses neighing to us. ๐Ÿ™‚ I remember being that enthusiastic. Now I smile when I hear such sounds, but I am not stunned or delighted. I EXPECT those touches.

who-am-iThe thing that was truly disconcerting about this particular adventure was Annia. She chose the same default avatar that I chose. She went nuts over the horses. So much else of our conversation sounded as if I’d gone back in time and was talking with myself. Disconcerting because I “feel” the same inside, but I can see how I’ve changed. Annia is the Ahuva of 7 months ago. She looks as I looked, sounds as I annia-not-ahuvasounded, wants to do much of what I wanted to do then. LOL. Of course, I did manage to shock her, EXACTLY as *I* would have been shocked. After the ride, Shenlei and I were discussing the auction for Cancer Research UK and I was trying on outfits. Annia did not understand the auction at first. *grin* She thought I was actually auctioning myself off for well, I guess for nefarious purposes. As if. Shenlei and I both passed inventory to her: skins, AOs, clothing, hair. ๐Ÿ™‚ It was so much fun to do for her what so many others had done for me. Paying forward yet again.

Great Masterpieces Updated

whispersI had the great fortune to participate in another of Callipygian Christensenโ€™s photo shoots. She and Trindolyn Beck and Sysperia Poppy are revisiting RL masterpieces. They are looking at the originals and recreating or reinterpreting them within SL. They are each doing a number of pieces and the official show opening is coming up in a few weeks.

I am torn between telling you exactly what we were doing and keeping it secret til the opening. I suspect that most everyone will be able to guess the masterpiece from the few pictures Iโ€™ve included here. So that is not really the secret. ๐Ÿ™‚ Itโ€™s the explanation of WHY we are dressed as we are that is so interesting. That is the part that is intriguing and exciting. Taking a scene and an event that we all know, but skewing it 180 degrees. Envisioning that moment as if it happened at Moulin Rouge. I have always been fascinated by Moulin Rouge. I am also fascinated by history and religion. I love sexy clothes. So for me, this was an exquisite combination of pleasures.

center Calli posed us for the first round of pictures. We waited as she reviewed the results, then made changes to the poseballs. You need to understand that the poseballs were specially created for this masterpiece by her friend Butch Adzebills For many of the other images Calli is creating the poses herself- these poses are not pre-fab poses available in SL. So this is not just creative Art, it is creative technical construction . After Calli went through the first takes, she moved every poseball for a better recreation of the image and put us back to position for more.

While the posing and chatter were a LOT of fun, I find that her concept was just as enjoyable. Yes, I’m sure there are some who will find it offensive. Ah well, such is life, is it not? I am sorry that something so clever will be seen by some as “wrong”. I loved shopping for the appropriate attire. LOL. I confess – i bought THREE possible outfits for her approval. The chat during the shoot was a riot. Nothing like a bunch of women held captive in lingerie to have wonderfully friendly and risque conversation.

the-right-sideI promise that as I have more information, I will let you know. I know 2 of the other masterpieces being recreated, and they should prove as stimulating as this one.

You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby

rhinestone-cowboyAlthough I am totally immersed in SL and am so at home here, I often feel like a newbie. I think many of my friends regard me as quite “young” still. To my great relief and happiness, my friends still mentor me and give me tips, hints, suggestions and clues for making my life in SL smoother and more fun. But compared to a REAL newbie – I am sooooo NOT a newbie anymore.

Shengri La is now an official SL Gateway (Fashion Research Institute). I often drop-in to help out, see who all is rezzing in. It is a mad house there. I had no idea how does-this-shirt-make-me-look-fatmany people rez in each MINUTE. Half the time I try to drop-in, I can’t get there because the sim is full. I’ve had to rez nearby and WALK in. LOL. But I do try to stop in at least once a week (and it really should be more often) and try to help newbies the way all the good folk helped me.

The first thing that strikes me each time is how grateful I am to have an AO. Remember back whenever in the fall when my friend mentioned I looked “stiff”? Okay, she wins. (Actually, she ALWAYS wins but that is a completely different story.) I LOVE my AO. Sure, there are 2 animations of which I’m not overly fond, but I’m more lazy than I am displeased so I’ve not removed them yet. But watching newbies walk queen-for-a-dayabout and stand – wow, stiff dweebs. I’m sorry – that’s just the truth. (And why I HATE working in opensim. Which is also another story. But there at least I am working a deal to get an AO, skin and hair. LOL).

The second thing that I notice is the newbies’ total lack of comprehension. They don’t know where they are, that they are all new, why they are there, or what they should be doing. Ah yes, I remember that well. Most of you reading this probably joined me some time along my adventures, as I met you in SL. But there are a few readers (/me waves hi to M and B, who have been reading since day 1 – Hi guys!!!) casual-attirewho remember how I got started here. I did my research BEFORE I signed up. Not only did I read up on SL and try to learn about it, I even contacted people who were already in-world, lining up my support team, as it were. Okay, not everyone has that luxury. But really – if you don’t know what SL is, why did you sign up?????? Why are you here??? YOU must have had SOME reason. Of course they did…. the streets of SL are paved with sex and money. /me does search on the map to find that sim.

by-george-shes-got-itWell, I truly must be the most repulsive or most unapproachable avatar in all of SL. Despite hanging around with the newbs, and despite hearing such conversations around me, do you realize that STILL not one person has propositioned me yet????? /me shakes head in bafflement. I don’t WANT them to proposition me, really, but the fact that everyone else seems to be hit on could make me wonder what’s wrong with me. (Good thing the auction is still fresh in my memory.) My first day at the hatching farm (gateway *grin*) when I had to walk in, I encountered two newbies who had strayed from the shelter. I met the woman first and was trying to guide her back to the stores and welcome area. Then we encountered the male. Immediately the male was propositioning the female, and they were trying to figure out HOW to do IT. In local chat of course. I said to them both that it was a totally inappropriate conversation and that if they were interested in performing that action at this time, I was not interested in waiting about to help them. The woman was quite surprised and asked me WHY it was inappropriate. Sheesh. Didn’t your mother teach you ANYTHING???? /me shuts mouth before more judgmental remarks slip out. I headed into the Gateway, leaving them to try to figure out how it’s done in SL.

The Gateway is hilarious, as wellcome-here-often-little-girl as maddening. You can’t move without bumping into someone else, because there are so many people. And they bump into you. And everyone is talking in local chat and they haven’t learned any SL conventions yet. *grin* I wait til I hear a specific question, or I see someone standing by themselves. Then I cut them from the herd and try to talk to them. Often someone else joins in. I’m always pleasantly surprised by how fast some people catch on to IM’ing, moving, flying, inventory. I was so completely clueless for days. I know now that a great deal of my problems were due to the terrible hardware issues I was having. Once I resolved that, SL began rezzing quickly and properly and everything made much more sense. So often I wonder if there is a correlation between the people who “get it” quickly and their computer hardware.

gee-she-looks-very-familiarI love watching as they all get items in their inventory. Soooo many nice things for free in the Gateway, but you MUST be a newbie to get them. Sigh. The vending machines tell me that I am too old. Some of the outfits are quite interesting. And some of the people – gee, they look very very familiar somehow. ๐Ÿ™‚

Happy Valentine’s Day

happy-valentines-dayIt’s Valentine’s Day
I wish for you all true love,
Happiness, Laughter.

Neko for a Night

neko-for-a-nightI took the day off today – I had a lot of RL stuff that had nothing to do with work. So when I got home and logged in, somehow it seemed appropriate to go and relax at the Crown and Pearl. I realized I’d not been there for a long time.

When I arrived there were five friends there. I was about to begin dancing when I realized that I was the only one there without a tail. Now I’m not usually one to bow to peer pressure. I have been there before when nearly everyone else was “tailled”. Tonight, however, I noticed the lack and commented on it. Although they assured me that I could stay anyway, Nat did pass me a tail. OMG. It had a notecard with a zillion instructions. Now I know why I don’t wear a tail. Nat laughed at me when I said all that to her and only-bad-photography-can-clip-nats-wings said “Just WEAR it”. LOL. So I did. Hey. It’s kind of cute, you know? I don’t know that it will be my normal attire, but it was fun. So Nat passed me ears as well and PRESTO! a Neko was born. ๐Ÿ™‚ You gotta love SL.

We all continued dancing and laughing as more folks arrived. I rather like watching the tail moving about as I dance. I may have to reconsider the whole subject. I”m not as sure about the ears. I think that both of them are scripted. I KNOW I don’t have time to figure out the scripting.

Ah. Speaking of time…. I did it again, folks. I volunteered. Yep. Yet again I volunteered at work for something for which I am probably not suited. I did mention that, somewhat, to the rocking-at-the-cnpproject leader. But when no one wants a job, even the incompetent are considered. So expect to hear more about the joy of Land Ownership and Land rights. ๐Ÿ™‚ Because I have a lot to learn in a very very very short time. At least I know a little bit more about this than I know about those trees. *grin* And THIS time- I have a teacher!!!! HELL!!!!!!! HELP!!!!!

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