Posts Tagged 'life'

Vanity is Costly

The moment you say “I’m worth it” you can be sure the level of your bank account will begin sinking, swirling around and down like the blue water in the … well, you know where you find blue water. My father used to tell me that “a boat is a hole in the ocean into which you throw money”. For me – vacations/travel are a boat. If I’m going, I want my creature comforts and I don’t want to deny myself anything. 🙂 For those of you who know me as Ahuva this attitude will come as no surprise. There might be some reading this who know me by my – oh heck. If Ahuva is my alter-ego, what is that other ego??? Anyway, in all my aspects I have decided that yep, I’m WORTH it.

Honour and I will be traveling for at least a week, if not longer. I will have days before and after The Great Transcontinental Escapade (hereafter known as TGTE). There are a lot of creature comforts that I would use in a week. It takes effort to maintain my Ahuva-ness. Unfortunately, the TSA gets very crabby when you try to take an entire suitcase of lotions and potions onboard the aircraft. I’m only taking a carry-on bag because I’m traveling light. *grin* I’m sure my definition of light is not Honour’s definition of light. Jus’ sayin’. By the way – did I mention that I’m flying first class? I’m worth it, you know. 🙂

I solved my lotions and potions issue by shipping a box of shampoo, conditioners, gel, creams etc. to Honour earlier this week. Do you realize how much it costs to ship from the US to Canada???? I was taken aback. Not only did I have to open the box so we could remove the spray bottle, but I had to list every single item in the box. I confess – it was a little embarrassing how many hair products I had in the box. *red face* My box has to go through customs and so everything in it has to be listed on the outside. Soooooo glad I won’t have to see the custom officer’s face as the box is inspected. The tab was roughly $100 to ship approximately $20 worth of product. *grin* On the other hand, I don’t have to carry them (“they’re heavy” she whined) and I don’t have to deal with the TSA. I quite like this solution.

I like this approach so much that I’m utilizing it again today. I went to the AAA yesterday and got maps and a trip tik and the books about hotels and other road information. I picked up 6 maps to cover Canada and Maine and the complementary books and the trip tik – all free. Today I go back to FedEx to ship them rather than carry them on board with me. 🙂 My father -A”h – would be appalled at this approach. (When the toll on the Henry Hudson bridge went from 10 cents to a quarter, he insisted that we go the long way around and take the Moshulu Parkway, which was FREE, rather than pay that outrageous additional fifteen cents.) But hey – I’m WORTH it. And I’m tucking in a few more lotions and potions with the maps.

Don’t tell Honour, but I shipped a trunk of shoes as well. You never know which shoes you might want to be wearing as you travel across country in an SUV with 2 cats, a dog, and an avatar. A woman likes to have choices, you know? And I’m worth it.

money down the drain

Transcontinental Tales

I don’t know why I said it. She kept talking, laying out her plans. When, where, how. I felt the words forming in the back of my head. The words began moving forward, much the way anesthesia starts rolling in and overtaking you when you are having surgery. My mouth opened and I heard myself say “Why don’t I drive with you?” And like that – it was done.

I’ve never had a ‘bucket list’. Travel is good, but not really something I think about much. My idea of paradise is being down the shore, chilling (metaphorically) on the beach, watching and hearing the ocean.  Oh sure, I like to drive. But…….. Drive across CANADA??? I’ve never even driven across the USA. Not only that, but we’ve never met face-to-face. And we’re planning to spend easily a week together in a car with 2 cats and a dog? As my friends and family keep asking: How do you KNOW she’s not an axe murderer???

It’s done. I have to trust that someone who has 2 cats and the cutest little fluffy dog is NOT an axe murderer.  (When would she find the TIME to stalk victims when she must cater to the demands of the four-footed rulers?)

Honour and I are setting out on an adventure. We are driving across Canada because Honour is relocating from British Columbia to a small island off the east coast of North America. That’s a lot of Canada. Did you know that at the moment, as I type, British Columbia is experiencing it’s hottest temperatures ever? And that a good part of BC is burning???  I’ve begun describing our trip as “Fires, Rockies, Plains, Lake, Cities, Ocean”.

The countdown has begun…. 3 1/2 days until I head to the airport and fly west, only to drive east.

OOTD 20150308

emotion and logic
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Sometimes those two can overlap, sometimes they are not even on the same screen. I am watching my mother suffer from medical issues that we cannot seem to alleviate. We have a theory of the cause and the progression. The solution appears beyond our grasp. I received some unexpected health information this past week. The timing was particularly poor. I expected to hear Result A. What I was told was Result B. Result B is what we believe to be the initial impetus for my mother’s condition. I was fatigued and still heavily medicated when I heard the result. Emotion rose up and throttled logic.

I know that just because I have B I may not end up like my mother. Millions of people have Result B and do not have my mother’s other issue. I know that my mother is older than I by several decades. Forewarned is forearmed and a lot can change in 30 years. I know all that. I know my doctors think that Result B is actually MUCH better than Result A because they think they can do something about B.

But.

It is not their parent lying in that bed, suffering. It is not, perhaps, their deepest fear to be trapped in a body that will not work as desired. There are compromises and there is flexibility and there is bowing to the inevitable and there is accepting life’s challenges with grace. I do understand all of that. You needn’t tell me. I KNOW. This is not about knowing. This is about feeling.
meeting of minds
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.
..

Sometimes Emotion and Logic align. I WILL ensure that I have the right to end my life with dignity when the time comes. That is my line in the sand. I’m not quitting. I’m going to continue to enjoy life and live it. I will catch the sun and sing it. But I will ensure that however, wherever, whenever the time comes – I will go gently into that good night.

OOTD 20150218

Most of life is perception, not reality.


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